Author: Catherine

“I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close.”  ~Pablo Neruda

ALL IN LOVE IS FAIR
by Stevie Wonder

Have you ever encountered young people, always accompanied by an adult, standing (or sitting) outside the front door of your favorite grocery store asking for a donation or selling something that you really didn’t want? These young people are usually collecting money for a team trip, a cheerleading competition, a charity, or selling Girl Scout cookies (my personal favorite).

Well, just call me Ms-I-Donate-to-Any-People-Hanging-Outside-the-Grocery-Store-Door. Sorry, but it’s true. I do! I’m a sucker for these kids. It doesn’t matter if they give me something in return because I’m going to give them money just the same.

Thinking about this made me think back to a time when young kids would sit outside the grocery store door holding a box of free puppies or free kittens.

One such day way back when, my mother allowed me to drive to the grocery store (I was a teen with a “new license” attitude) provided I took my younger sister with me. If ever there was a reason to crank up the family station wagon to run an errand, I was there ready, willing, and able to make the trip. Unfortunately, these trips usually meant that one of my younger siblings would have to go with me.

On this particular trip, my sister and I were leaving the grocery store when we spotted two kids (accompanied by an adult, of course) sitting on the sidewalk holding a box of free puppies. Being petless at the time, my sister and I thought it would be a great idea to give a puppy a new home … our home.

It was FREE! How could anyone turn down a free puppy? Also, it’s hard to look at small, tow-headed, wide-eyed kids holding a box of free puppies and NOT take one home. So, we made our puppy selection, loaded up the car and drove home.

Mom was not happy (that is putting it mildly). She suggested that it would be a great idea for us to load up the puppy and drive back to the grocery to return it. As our good luck would have it, the puppy people were gone. What choice did we have but to drive back home with our new pet?

We were all smiles! Mom was all frowns! Dad said, “Oh, what a cute puppy, now find her a new home.”

While waiting to find a home for our puppy, my siblings and I decided to name her. Sooie! That’s what we named the puppy because she looked like a little pig. Sooie! That seemed like a swell name for a puppy that looked like a pig. Mom and Dad were not happy. They didn’t want us to name the puppy because then we might have to keep her. Things were not looking very good for Sooie, if the truth be known.

As much as my family loves animals (and we had our fair share growing up), I can say truthfully that Sooie was the dumbest dog we ever had as a pet. It was only by the grace of God that we found someone to take her and give her a good home.

Not long after, I seem to recall the person who took Sooie said something to Mom about wanting to return her. This story did have a happy ending, but I seem to have forgotten what happened to Sooie or the person who took her. Maybe they moved to Maine. That would have been my choice.

Today, just as expected, teens were outside the grocery store door asking for donations for a road trip. They are going to represent our city in a national softball tournament, or something like that. Today, just like always, I gave at the front door!

© Catherine Evermore. All rights reserved.

 

In 2018, I kept a journal about my journey with Non-Hodgkin Lymphoma. It was a way of recording my feelings – good and bad – and it really helped to write about one of the worst experiences of my life.

The following was posted on this website.

Cancer – July 27, 2018

Six months ago, I had long blond hair. Today I am bald.

Just before I started chemo, I had my hair cut short. Less than two weeks later, right after my first chemo treatment, it started to fall out. It started coming out in clumps, so I got a buzz cut that was actually quite cute. Within days what little hair that was left fell out.

That was before I lost my eyebrows and long eyelashes.

When I go outside, I wear a scarf or a cap. When I’m inside, I take it off. Lately, I’ve been removing whatever is covering my bald head while inside a store. Most always while at the cancer center.

I walk with a cane because of poor balance. The state handicapped sticker on my car is temporary, but it is a huge help when I go to the store.

I look at myself in the mirror and barely recognize myself. I know. I know. It’s just hair and it will grow back. This is true. I’m not that vain. However, it is difficult to see how I look today compared to six months ago.

We won’t talk about the weight loss. Nearly 30 lbs. to date.

We won’t talk about the numbness in my fingers and toes.

We won’t talk about the eye floaters that popped up on the day of chemo #5.

We won’t talk about the constant lack of energy and inability to sleep more than 2 or 3 hours at a time.

What I want to focus on are the results of my last two PET scans. No visible signs of cancer. My next PET will be week after next. I’m praying for the same results. No visible signs of cancer.

I have completed six rounds of the most intense chemo known to man. It has killed off everything – good and bad. Every 21 days I have spent hours at the cancer center hooked up to all kinds of infusions. The port in my chest has been a lifesaver.

Every Monday, I have shown up for lab work. The week after chemo is the most difficult because the results are very low. I’m sick for at least 10 days and slowly regain some strength. Food tastes like metal so I don’t eat much. I call these days the 10 days from hell. They are.

It is now time to move on to the next phase of this journey. In just a couple of weeks, after my next PET scan, I will meet with my doctor and she will lay out a plan of action for the next several months that will probably then become the next several years.

I know that it will take time for certain side effects to go away and even longer for my hair to grow back. The numbness in my fingers and toes may never go away. There is no guarantee.

As difficult as it has been going through chemo … and there have been times when I wanted to give up … the support that I have received from family, friends, and the cancer center got me to where I am today.

There are no words for the sense of gratitude that I am feeling today.

Catherine

© Catherine Evermore. All rights reserved.

“Come here, please, and help me float this boat.”

“You want to float that old wooden boat?”

“Yes.”

“Where will you be floating your old wooden boat?”

“In the moat.”

“The moat?”

“Yes.”

“That dirty old moat?”

“The queen had it cleaned out.”

“So, we are going to float your old wooden boat in the cleaned out moat?”

“Yes.”

“Will there be food? What shall we eat?”

“Not a problem. We shall eat White Castles.”

“White Castles?”

“Yes. It seems appropriate that if we are going to float the old wooden boat in the queen’s cleaned out moat that we should eat White Castles.”

“May I have some water, please?”

“Yes and here is some Crown Royal to go with it.”

“Crown Royal?”

“Yes. It’s that float the boat in the queen’s cleaned out moat thing that I just explained to you.”

“One more thing?”

“Go ahead …”

“Are we are going to meet the queen?”

“Yes.”

“What is her name?”

“We call her the Queen of Delete.”

“The Queen of Delete?”

“Yes.”

“Odd name.”

“Odd queen.”

“Does she have a crown?”

“She will have a crown just as soon as a few others get here.”

“A few others?”

“Yes. They have stolen a crown from the Tower of London to give to the Queen of Delete.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that. We could get tossed in jail … or much worse … thrown in the moat and eaten by the alligators.”

“Not to worry. The queen had the alligators removed and sent to Florida.”

“Florida? In America?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Well, it’s like this. There’s a college in Florida. It is home of the Florida Gators, and their football games are played in The Swamp. Did I give you too much information?”

“Oh, no but do you want to know something?”

“What?”

“I like this boat floating in the moat stuff.”

“Good. We shall do it again.”

© Catherine Evermore. All rights reserved.

Dreams
by Fleetwood Mac

Back in the early 1970’s, I lived west of here in a small town called Small Town, USA. What I loved about Small Town was the size of the town and the friendliness of the people. Having lived in the city most of my life, moving to the country was a refreshing change of pace. Something I learned rather quickly was that Small Town had many of the same problems as Big City, just on a smaller scale.

In no time at all, I started to make friends. Seems word got out rather quickly that there was a new girl in town. There probably wasn’t much to talk about around that time which would explain the chatter about someone new. Everyone I met was very friendly and only too happy to help out their new neighbor.

One day I walked to a restaurant about a block away from where I worked. Not knowing a soul, and being rather timid about eating alone, I found a booth at the back of the restaurant and sat there all alone trying to not make eye contact with anyone. All of a sudden, a rather tall, well-dressed blond woman walked right up to my booth, extended her hand to introduce herself, and then asked if she could join me. I was a bit surprised but quickly said, “Yes, please do.”

Betty was her name. She was the owner of an apparel shop, and she wanted to welcome me to town. (Guess word got out faster than I thought.) She had been raised in Small Town, and she knew quite a few people in town. From that day forward, we were fast friends.

After that, I started to meet other people and soon found myself invited for Sunday dinners. The meals were always delicious and usually consisted of veggies fresh from the garden, fried chicken or baked ham, mashed potatoes, biscuits and gravy, sweet tea, pie, and ice cream. You name it, they served it, and if anything was left over, they sent me home with a “to go” plate. I never went hungry while living in Small Town.

One of the things I did while living there was volunteer work at the VA Hospital. My assignment was to sit with a man named Elroy. Elroy had suffered a minor stroke, and he needed help with a few things. He was a country boy from Moultrie, Georgia, and he lived about as far back in the woods as one could live. I would sit with Elroy for a couple of hours on Saturdays, and we would talk, play cards, or I would wheel him outside if the weather was nice and we would share snacks (usually something he had asked me to pick up at the grocery store.). He seemed to appreciate my company.

One night I received a phone call from Elroy, and it went something like this:

“Hello.”

“Cath, is that you?”

“Yes, it is. Who is this?”

“It’s Elroy.”

“Elroy? How did you get my phone number? More importantly, what is wrong?”

“Well, I looked it up in the phone book, and I need your help.”

“Oh? What is it you need?”

“Well, it’s like this. Back in Moultrie, I have this little business, and I need help with something. I can pay you $800 if you will help me out.”

“Dear God, $800 to do what? Is it legal?”

“Well, Cath, I run moonshine, and I need someone to make a run. Can you do it?”

“Elroy, I don’t believe I can run moonshine for you. I’m not ready to spend the next few years in prison.”

“No, Cath, you won’t get caught. The cops all know I run moonshine, so they won’t bother you.”

“Well, Elroy, as much as I would like to help you out, and I sure could use the money, I’m gonna have to pass on this one.”

“Okay, Cath. Will you still come to see me next Saturday?”

“Sure, Elroy. See you then.”

Moonshine!

Little did I know that on Saturday, Elroy was going to be discharged from the hospital. When I got to his room, I found not one but two wives ready to take him home. Two wives! They both looked at me, I looked at them, so I quickly explained that I was a volunteer at the hospital.

They were sweet little dumplings, and Elroy seemed happy to be leaving the hospital. We all hugged good-bye, and I never did hear from Elroy after that day. However, I suspected he went back to running moonshine … or he found someone to run it for him.

You just never know what you are going to find in Small Town, USA.

© Catherine Evermore. All rights reserved.

One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer
by George Thorogood and the Destroyers

Build us a hammock
Beneath the moon and the stars
Tie it to the nearest trees
With ribbons and bows
Fancy silk scarves
Softly blowing in the breeze

© Catherine Evermore. All rights reserved.

Lazy Afternoon
by Jackie Allen